We All Need Each Other

A few weeks ago I was running in a nearby park. This park has a path that stretches for miles, but a small section is interrupted by a neighbourhood. It was here that I happened to be, on a lovely warm fall evening.

Still on the path, I ran up a short but steep hill that precedes this neighbourhood. At the top, I noticed an elderly woman walking by herself. She had stopped some university students, asking them where a certain street was. The students tried to explain that it was some distance from where she was, and they were as helpful as they could be in directing her to her destination.

In an instant, I realized this woman needed more help than just directions. I approached her (as well as another young woman who had a cell phone). After asking her some basic questions including the phone number to call home, it confirmed my suspicion. This dear woman had some form of serious memory loss.

Eventually I was able to contact a daughter who was going to pick her up, as well as locate her father who I suspected had similar memory issues. I assured the daughter I would stay with her mother until she arrived.

During those minutes that we stood together, it was a very humbling experience. She felt humiliated that this had happened, and fearful that she would lose her freedom. She was so grateful I was there, and even put her arms around to hug and thank me. I reassured her that none of this was her fault and that we was doing the best she could. We both cried a little.

Then her daughter came, and whisked her off..

As I resumed my run, I wept. So many emotions went through me in a matter of moments. I feel them now, weeks later as I write this post.

It brought feelings up of my own mother, who is also living with dementia. The vulnerability, the frustration and the fear that comes with the realization that the memory is slipping away. The poignant fragility of life when something as precious as our minds begins to leave us forever.

It made me think of the daughter, and how I could so relate to the alarm in her voice on the phone, in both the tears of relief and frustration as she hugged her mother upon arrival. I've been there many times and in many different ways. There is no road map here as one cares for a parent at this stage of life. It is such a bitter sweet experience.

It reminded me of how much we need each other in this lifetime.  It calls me to be there for others, even if I don't always know the answer or do the right thing. 


I just have to try. 

Namaste. _/l\_