Endings....and Beginnings.

“Endings are important because when a memory emerges we are invited to think back and speculate on a deeper meaning... a life lesson, a piece of wisdom, a gift we couldn't see at the time." 

In yoga, we talk a lot about cultivating mindfulness, training our mind to be in the present moment. And there is so much value in that. So often our minds are either focused on the past or the future. Have you ever sat down to eat a beautiful meal, but don't really taste it because your mind is elsewhere? I sure have. Our minds like to busy thinking. And it is indeed a practice to slow them down.

However, I also think there is value at looking at the past. The past holds so many life lessons and experiences in which we can grow from in a multitude of ways. They shape who we are, and can influence who we become.

The other day my husband brought up a little photo album of my marathon five years ago. It was on the day the Ottawa marathon was taking place and he thought it would be interesting to look back and reminisce about that experience we intimately shared together. I confess it is still sitting on the counter, unopened. I keep saying I'll get to it, but other 'more important' things (and 'not so important' things) seem to take precedence. But I know once I open that book, a flood gate of tender memories will fill my heart.

For my 60th birthday, my husband also wrote out 60 wonderful memories to reflect back on. Rather than reading them all at once, he reads a few of them to me in bed every week, and I take time to let them sink in a little, before drifting off to sleep. They fill me with so many emotions, mostly happy, some sad, but each one rich in its own way.

Obviously, not all endings are happy. Some of the saddest endings were when my parents died, and also some beloved friends. Or when we dropped our twin daughters off at universities in separate cities as they began their life without us. Or when my newly married daughter and her husband moved to Scotland this summer. Or when we left our sweet home after 25 years, the home where we raised these two girls, and in a community that supported us so much.

But even so, there is always a beginning that follows an ending. Even though my parents are now both gone, they live inside of me, and the tender memories I have, also live on. Our daughters are both strong independent women who are making their way through life in a way I couldn't be more proud of, and we continue to have a very close relationship that has only deepened in time, in spite of the distance between us. The home we moved to has served us so very well, and we appreciate it more with each passing year.

The value of reflecting on these endings, is what I learned from their life experience, about myself and about life. How I hopefully grew from each. And whether they were stressful or carefree, tragic or joyful, how each one was a gift to be cherished in its own unique way.

For me, it is a practice to not only be mindful of the present, but to resist over thinking the future.  To take the time to reflect on the endings and all the richness they contain.

To take it all in.. the memories, and the gratitude for all the life lessons learned. It might just make the beginnings even richer.

Namaste _/l\_