Your Good Heart

I had an interesting conversation with a middle aged woman working in a clothing store the other day. She was telling me she was getting back to the gym after a three year hiatus. When I mentioned if she had considered yoga, she said yes but she was scared to death of it.

I think it's sad that yoga has been heavily branded to be for the young and beautiful who look great in spandex and can wrap their legs around their necks like a Cirque du Soleil performer.  But what about the rest of us? 

It's no surprise that stepping into a yoga class for the first time can be very intimidating. I too must admit that when I take teacher courses and workshops I'm well aware of my limitations compared to others. But I've also learned to love what I can do and to just stay open to growing in my own time.

It's a humbling thing to bring our imperfect selves to the mat especially in a culture that values perfection. But that is precisely what yoga is about. It's about compassion, not competition- about loving our bodies, not loathing them. And it's about setting down the weight to be better, so we can lift our hearts to just be.

Yes, yoga is about stretching, and strengthening, balancing and breathing. But it's also about coming home to ourselves, and embracing the 'joyful mess' of our humanness with kindness and acceptance.

So if you're scared to death to step into your first yoga class, remember-  just bring your good heart- that's all you really need.  Spandex- totally optional. :)

Namaste. _/l\_

An Inside Job

I've been thinking of this quote lately. It's cute and light hearted but there's also a lot of wisdom behind it.

When I was younger, I seemed to spend much of my energy waiting for happiness to come when all the outer stuff was in order. The job, the family, the home, the health- there was always something that needed tweaking before happiness could be complete.

It took many years before I fully surrendered to the fact that happiness does not have to hang on life being in order. And as I get older, it is more and more apparent that something will always be out of order to some degree. Yet amidst that disorder or what my daughter coins "the joyful mess" the invitation to be happy still remains.

There isn't a magic bullet for this, nor should there be. Each one of us has to discover it in our own way. But here are a few ideas that have been helpful for me when happiness seems just out of reach.

First of all, it's very important to acknowledge how you you do feel. So often we try to avoid uncomfortable feelings because we don't like feeling this way. But if we can allow ourselves to identify and touch whatever sensation we're experiencing- with curiosity and non judgement- it can often soften the heart enough to open to new possibilities.

Even in the midst of a challenging time, I often ask " Can I still make space to see the blessings in my life?" Like catching the brilliance of a coral sky as the day begins, or spotting the fluffed up cardinal perched on a snow covered branch. There are so many miracles that happen each day that are just waiting for us to embrace. Reminding myself to notice and give thanks is a huge anecdote for happiness.

I have also found that stepping out of myself and becoming helpful to someone else can be transformative, time and time again.  Whether it's a kind word, a small gesture, a thoughtful act- these can help to lift one's heart and open up one's perspective about where happiness truly lies in life.

Daily yoga and meditation practice for me have also been integral in remembering that happiness is available amidst the messiness of life. Quieting the mind, following the breath, allowing my imperfect self inside my imperfect life to come to my cushion and my mat, is a refuge for me. And if done regularly has often helped me stay steadier during those times when happiness gets derailed.

We can't always be happy of course. But is it possible to find the tiniest of sparks of happiness even in the darkest times? I'd like to believe so.

Wishing you happiness. From the inside out.

Namaste. _/l\_

The Challenge Has Begun!!

Drum roll please..... the challenge has begun!

Tomorrow begins a new year of yoga, teaching my beloved students and learning along with them. To commemorate this new beginning, I am offering a 30 day challenge that everyone can do. Yup.. everyone.

For my students, the beginning of the challenge starts at the first class of the year, but for anyone else, just pick a day, and simply begin.

So what is the challenge?
Ten minutes on the mat. Not 100 Sun Salutations or an hour of vigorous yoga.  Just- ten-short-minutes.

You may wonder- how could this be a challenge? In my view, it's getting on the mat that is the challenge, rather than staying there. I know this from experience. How many times have I thought- "I'll do it after I write this email, or wash these dishes, or have a shower?" It's funny how tricky our mind can be when it comes to things like this. Why is so hard to put aside our everyday tasks and have a few minutes with ourselves? It just is.
However, we can all find ten minutes a day to fit this in. It's not intimidating nor does it cut into anything we might feel we need to do. And I can guarantee that once you're on the mat- once you've begun- you'll want to stay just a little bit longer..

So to begin, here are a few guidelines..

1. Find a place that has no or minimal distractions. A quiet room where you have enough space to lay down a mat, and close the door. Or a little corner that is away from the centre of activity, conversations etc. Not in front of the tv- (you get the picture.)

2. Make a date with your mat. This may take some experimentation as to the best time of day or evening for you, but once you find something that works, try to do it the same time everyday. You will become accustomed to setting that time aside, and it begins to feel more natural. And the habit begins to form.

3. Play some quiet relaxing music, or practice in silence. The object is to come home to yourself, to become aware, and sensitive to how you're feeling, both in mind and body. To 'let go of your day' and simply be with your breath and the movement of your body.

4. Don't worry that you might not know 'how to do it right'. I will include below a couple vinyassas (flow movements) to help you get started, but just begin to move your body slowly. Ten minutes is meant to be a warm up, gentle practice so it is unlikely you will hurt yourself. Listen to your body for guidance, stretching muscles and lubricating joints- never going into pain. Every movement has value so use this time to appreciate yourself for taking the time to come to your mat.

5. Move with your breath. Let your breath guide the movement. Keep your mental focus on the inhale and exhale. This is what separates a yoga practice from a work out. Breath is exceedingly important, as it relaxes both the mind and the body. Certain movements are typically done on an inhale, and others on an exhale, but I wouldn't be overly concerned about that if you aren't sure. Awareness of breath is more important. And if your mind is busy and you catch yourself 'thinking' (and you will) just gently bring your awareness back to your breath, time and time again. In this way, the practice can also become a meditation with far reaching benefits.

6. When you're finished, take a minute or two in savasana (relaxation pose) allowing the practice to be integrated. Notice any effects from your time on the mat.

7. And if you miss a day, read my previous post.. :)

8. If you're a student of mine, there will be a little reward at the end of the 30 days (we all like incentives, don't we? :)). But if not, reward yourself with something meaningful if that is something that appeals to you.

And that's it! I hope you can find your tens minutes on the mat. I guarantee it will be time well spent..

Namaste. _/l\_

Samples of vinyassas..

1. Start in Table. Inhale into Table- Exhale into Cat- Inhale into Cow (Dog)- Exhale into Downward Dog- Inhale into Table- Exhale into Child- Inhale into Table.

2. Six Directions of the Spine: Start in Table- Inhale into Cow- Exhale into Cat- Thread the Needle (Inhale- Lift one arm up, parallel to mat - Exhale- float it down to mat, slide it across to the other side, under the other arm, resting shoulder onto the mat- switch sides)- Inhale into Table- Come to Kneeling in preparation for Kneeling Crescent Moon (Inhale- Lift one arm straight up alongside ear, other hand at hip- Exhale sideways in the opposite direction of the raised arm- switch sides)- Kneeling Backbend (Interlace fingers behind back- Inhale root down through the legs- Exhale- move slowly into gentle backbend)- Inhale back to Table.

Good Intentions

This new year brings a wry smile to my face.

How many times have I sat down in a determined 'I can do it this year- you bet' kind of attitude, writing out my new year's resolutions? Probably forty, give or take a few years when I didn't care or just didn't get around to it until the shininess of the new year had worn off.

Like so many others I always have this initial burst of enthusiasm and optimisim thinking I can create a new and improved me in some way or other. A fresh start, a fresh me. Until that is, the day I do or don't do what I wrote on that piece of paper and then it all goes up in smoke until the next year.

So much in the past has hinged on all or nothing for me.  I'm sure it has a lot to do with my perfectionistic personality, but what a shame, what a waste! So many unfulfilled opportunities missed because of my silly, unreachable standards.

So this year before sitting down pen to paper I paused and gave the whole intention thing another look.

What if I just took one step each day in the direction that could help me live more fully? And if I get derailed- what if I just got back on that track and tried again?

And no matter how long or short I can keep an intention, isn't the time that I actually succeed worth celebrating rather than writing off? Every journey starts with one step- and each step counts. So whatever the outcome, those good intentions took thought and reflection to create, and initiative and courage to execute. There is value in beginning, even if the outcome is not what I hoped it could be.

And maybe by accepting with humility that I will make mistakes, that I won't always keep up and that I am susceptible to human frailty I'll be able to find more self compassion when I fall short of my expectations. By realigning myself and trying again, maybe there will be a renewed sense of optimism and enthusiasm found simply in the act of trying. Just maybe.

So this year, rather than carving my failure or success in stone, I throw caution to the wind and set my sail on good intentions without a destination, opening to wherever that wind shall lead me. It's bound to be an interesting journey..

Happy New Year everyone. May all your good intentions lead you to a life fully lived.

Namaste. _/l\_

Santa 'Pause'

With only a week away, this can be a time of heightened busyness and the balance in our lives can become somewhat tipsy!

I’m so excited about my family coming home and I love the many festivities. I'm also conscious it is a time to be more mindful about balancing all the balls in the air- buying /wrapping presents, planning meals, and getting as much done ahead of time before my kids walk through the door!

What has been helpful to me this year are a number of little tips to help me pause, centre, and come back to my heart so that I can be present in the ‘doing’ rather than going into automatic pilot, just to get everything done.

Here are some of tips if fatigue or stress is throwing you under Santa’s sleigh!

1. Go for a walk outside. There is something so therapeutic about taking a walk, feeling the fresh air in your lungs, the earth beneath your feet, the sky above your head. And if you walk by yourself, or quietly with someone, it allows your mind to take a rest, and in doing so helps to put the chaos back into order. And if you can, take a walk in a park or in a forest.  In the Globe in Mail recently, there was a great article on ‘forest therapy’. Studies show that walking in the forest can significantly lower levels of cortisol, a stress hormone, along with blood pressure and heart rate. And since it is a place where noise and distractions are replaced with the serenity of nature, it can free up the mind to take what it needs to rest and rejuvenate.

So take time to walk, even if it’s on your lunch break, early in the morning, in the evening…anytime.   

2. If your habit is to turn on the radio or tv when you’re at home, try being quiet, or listen to soft music as you go about your activities. This can also give the mind a rest to eliminate external noise and distractions.

3. Practice gratitude. As you wake up in the morning, instead of jumping out of bed take a few moments to pause- and say thanks. Thanks for your breath, the bed you’re sleeping in, the partner you share it with- whatever comes to mind. And then practise gratitude throughout the day. Sometimes if I’m waiting at stop lights, I start to list everything I can be grateful for. Balance is often restored when we think of our blessings. It’s a powerful practice.

4. Set an intention for the day. Sometimes when we set an intention (for example ‘to be grateful throughout the day') it settles inside of us and can pop up unexpectedly as the day unfolds. Writing it down is even more significant, helping to guide it into our subconscious. I have a jar on my desk that I use as my intention holder, and it's a helpful reminder to re-set over the course of the day.

5. Take a few moments for some gentle yoga. Coming to the mat for even 10 minutes is so restorative. Some hip circles, cat/cow poses, shoulder rolls, child’s pose- anything that would feel good in the body. Keep the attention on the breath and the focus internal.

Here is a simple vinyassa (flow) series that is easy to do and feels so relaxing.

Start by coming into Table Pose. Inhale into Table - Exhale into Cat -Inhale into Cow-Exhale into Downward Dog-Inhale to Table-Exhale into Child-Inhale back to Table.

6. Come back to the breath. No matter what you are doing, we can always return to the breath, the anchor that helps us return to heart, time and time again. This can be brief- even a minute of breath practice is transformative for the mind and body.

It can be as simple as drawing attention to the in breath and the out breath. Here are a few other breath practices that I have found helpful as well.

Using the breath practice above, extend the exhale so it is longer than the inhale. You can count if it helps to stay focused on the breath- 4 counts on the inhale, 6 on the exhale.

The Centering Breath: Take a few natural breaths and then extend the inhale breath into a long smooth breath, followed by a similar exhale. Repeat the practice- natural breaths with intermittent longer inhales and exhales. 

The Box or Square Breath: Imagine the 4 four sides of a box. Starting from the corner of the bottom of the box, inhale up the side of the box, exhale across the top , inhale down the other side-exhale along the bottom. Repeat. If you like you can add a little pause at the end of each inhale and each exhale. It can helpful to count as you start the practice (example, 4 counts on both the inhale and exhale) and then let the counting go once it feels natural.

7. Getting enough rest and eating well before the holiday has always helped me too. It isn’t always easy with social get togethers and festive foods and drinks, but it can help keep or restore balance if needed!

8. And of course, anything else that is your own tried and true practice to help restore balance during challenging times in our lives. Exploring the things that bring us back to ourselves, is an empowering practice in helping us finding peace at this busy holiday time..and any time.

May you enjoy balance in your life and best wishes for a warm and love filled season!

Namaste. _/l\_

Breathing in Balance

Fifteen days- and counting -until Christmas. Even though I'm a little ahead of myself compared to most years, I've got lots to keep me busy until our kids step through the front door!

However this year thankfully, I don't have my 'knickers in a twist' like I normally do.
So what has changed?

My daughter was home last week, which was a rare and special treat. One of our goals of her visit was to bake and decorate together. As we opened up the box of tree ornaments she said (half) jokingly "You might as well do this yourself Mom, because you'll just end up rearranging all the ones I hang!”

We both laughed- and I said 'Not anymore, Camille. Having you here hanging them with me is way more important than any Martha Stewart tree.” We still took our time and made it look pretty, but it felt effortless and joyful.

I'm sure age has something to do with letting go of some of these less important details but I also have to give credit to some other practices- including my yoga practice. It really has helped me find more balance and perspective in my life, at least some of the time :).

In yoga, balance is finding the middle path where both ease and effort co-exist. Both matter. It's important to 'show up' on our mat, to put a genuine effort into our practice. Growth comes with effort. But if we effort too much without honouring the body, we can injure ourselves. And yoga is not just a work out.

The component of ease exists as well. It doesn't mean we don't come to our edge in a pose and explore what that feels like- but we do it with sensitivity and awareness. It's also a time of surrendering, and letting go of the outcome and self judgement. Opening to something greater than the small minded view of ourselves.

So how do we do that? I believe there are many ways, individual to all. But one of the most important, is to return to the breath as often one can. Before the pose begins, come to the breath to center, to connect with something greater than ourselves. Then move into the pose with breath and awareness. Notice the breath while in a pose- is it fluid and smooth or laboured? There are times when the body is working harder in some poses, but generally the breath should feel natural and free. Finally invite breath to come out of the pose and back to help center once again.

Settling our awareness on the in and out breath will return us to ourselves time and time again. It connects us to this place of wisdom and balance that is always available to us. This place where effort and ease reside together naturally and joyfully.

May you continue to enjoy balance in this dance of effort and ease, wherever you may seek it. And may your breath be a loving guide.

Namaste. _/l\_

My Tool Box

As we continue our weekly yoga sessions with the theme of balance, there is a saying that has stuck with me, first heard from my teacher, Catherine.

“We don't always know balance is until we experience what it's like to be out of balance.”

So true. We often judge ourselves as weak when we don't feel grounded and aligned, clear headed and rational, competent and calm. But actually, these times are full of information for us- and when we can grow our awareness around how we feel, as well as the things that help us return to balance, these unsteady times can actually become some of our greatest teachers.

True balance is never a static thing. Like a student once said, “It's like flying in an airplane. The pilot knows the course and efforts to stay on course- but the actual time spent 'smack dab' on course is really very momentary".

Life is like that. Most of the time, we have our course and we veer off it a little but find our way back. Other times, something really throws us off and it isn't easy to recalibrate and get our legs beneath us again.

But is there anything that can help us stay a little steadier and more balanced in all the ups and downs in life?

Personally I think yes, as I've seen it in my own life, and lives of those near and dear to me. I call it my tool box. These are all practices that have helped me at different stages of my life- some more than others, but they are my 'go to' place when I can't seem to get my sea legs. And when I do them regularly I do find that the pendulum of balance doesn't swing quite as wildly either. At least not all the time. :)

These practices aren't rocket science, but they have helped me build awareness in myself and create a sense of wellbeing time and time again. A few of them include a regular spiritual-meditation/yoga practice, a healthy diet, enough rest, and time spent in nature.

What works for me, may not work for you- the key is to try different things and then observe how they make you feel. If they help, include them in your own tool box and experiment by practising them for a time. You may see that if they do become part of your regular practice, they will feel more natural and empowering when you really do need them.

There is a great comfort in 'coming home to oneself' when we experience times of uncertainty and vulnerability. A place where we can ride the fluctuations in life. The place that resides in each of our hearts. May we all continue to know that place with whatever tools are right for us.

Namaste  _/l\_